07:43:00
What is today called Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, or ADHD, has been a recognized condition, albeit perceived in many ways, for likely hundreds of years. Stimulants have been used for treating it for more than seven decades now. However, about fifteen years ago, I still believed that ADHD wasn't real and that it might just an excuse for lazy parenting.
But then, in spite of my denial, my first two kids from my second marriage developed into pre-teens and developed problems in completing their school assignments, even as otherwise excellent students. These two children had always resisted doing anything they didn't like doing, and they had never cooperated by doing their fair allotment of the household chores as my older ten children had. Their floundering at school, though, was what caused me to belatedly get them in for thorough assessments, resulting in positive diagnoses for ADHD and ADD.
The younger of the two kids, my daughter, had ADHD, plus she was Oppositional Defiant (ODD). Lots of parents with ODD kids apparently "give up" on them, letting the children take charge of themselves. I couldn't do that with my daughter, even though I felt like it, because it would have put her at even more risk in the community. But it was hugely challenging to stay "in charge" of her because of her constant resistance.
My son's ADD was without the hyperactivity aspect, and his symptoms were much less "in my face" than my daughter's. In adulthood, he doesn't think he had ADD. I'm convinced of it, though, and also that their father had it. My first ten children (from my first marriage) were all non-ADHD, and these two children went through very thorough ADHD assessments. I was so frustrated by the challenges they presented that I was willing to medicate them, but they were unwilling because they disliked the side effects of every medication they tried.
During a particular discussion with this son as a teen-when I was thoroughly frustrated with his behavior-I offered an observation. He didn't laugh, so I guess he didn't appreciate the humor embedded in my emphatic remark, "You're the second most annoying person I ever gave birth to." And he was. His younger sister was the first. For years I despaired of them learning the things I was trying to teach them. But they both are doing quite well now.
My ADHD children were quite the same as my others with one important aspect of discipline. My first five kids all threw tantrums...but my last eight didn't. My fifth, at fourteen months, was cured a week or so after I discovered what to change in my parenting style. What I had learned with him worked just as well with my ADHD kids as it did with the rest. You too can opt into a tantrum-free lifestyle, even with ADHD children.
But then, in spite of my denial, my first two kids from my second marriage developed into pre-teens and developed problems in completing their school assignments, even as otherwise excellent students. These two children had always resisted doing anything they didn't like doing, and they had never cooperated by doing their fair allotment of the household chores as my older ten children had. Their floundering at school, though, was what caused me to belatedly get them in for thorough assessments, resulting in positive diagnoses for ADHD and ADD.
The younger of the two kids, my daughter, had ADHD, plus she was Oppositional Defiant (ODD). Lots of parents with ODD kids apparently "give up" on them, letting the children take charge of themselves. I couldn't do that with my daughter, even though I felt like it, because it would have put her at even more risk in the community. But it was hugely challenging to stay "in charge" of her because of her constant resistance.
My son's ADD was without the hyperactivity aspect, and his symptoms were much less "in my face" than my daughter's. In adulthood, he doesn't think he had ADD. I'm convinced of it, though, and also that their father had it. My first ten children (from my first marriage) were all non-ADHD, and these two children went through very thorough ADHD assessments. I was so frustrated by the challenges they presented that I was willing to medicate them, but they were unwilling because they disliked the side effects of every medication they tried.
During a particular discussion with this son as a teen-when I was thoroughly frustrated with his behavior-I offered an observation. He didn't laugh, so I guess he didn't appreciate the humor embedded in my emphatic remark, "You're the second most annoying person I ever gave birth to." And he was. His younger sister was the first. For years I despaired of them learning the things I was trying to teach them. But they both are doing quite well now.
My ADHD children were quite the same as my others with one important aspect of discipline. My first five kids all threw tantrums...but my last eight didn't. My fifth, at fourteen months, was cured a week or so after I discovered what to change in my parenting style. What I had learned with him worked just as well with my ADHD kids as it did with the rest. You too can opt into a tantrum-free lifestyle, even with ADHD children.
About the Author:
Learn more about preventing tantrumsin ADHD children . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to help ADHD children.
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